Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Pete and Repeat sat on a fence...

1. Putting your left arm out doesn't give you the right of way. Especially if you're on a bicycle, because you really won't win.

2. Do you think snails get really frustrated when they try to run away from people? Like in their heads they're screaming "COME ON! COME ON! WHY CAN'T I RUN FASTER?? SHE'S GOING TO STEP ON M..."

3. Whenever I hear a really loud, obnoxious motorcycle (yeah, I'm talking to you Harley Davidson) I have a quick fantasy of shooting the person riding it.

4. I saw a car with the license plate "ROTARD" and I've adopted it as my new favorite word.

5. Does this picture make you laugh as much as it makes me laugh?

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

I'm doing just fine on my own, but thanks.

Today I was invited to a Penetration Webinar.

And I'm all like, woah, Visa, back the hell up.

I'm not that kind of girl.

It is free, but still.

Monday, May 05, 2008

No doubt.

I like how open minded we are in our dreams. We accept everything as real, no matter how far fetched or ridiculous it may be. We don't stop to consider that the beautiful flying monkey couldn't possibly be real, we just enjoy it as it happens. We don't stop running just because vampires don't exist, we know in our hearts that if we stop running we will die.

When I found out that the twins I had aborted had survived and my boyfriend's mom (who performed the abortion) was raising them as her own I didn't stop to consider how exactly a four month old fetus could survive, I just knew I wanted my children back. And when that big ghost man was playing his music box to lure children out of their rooms so he could steal them I didn't say to myself "that's not possible", no. I crawled into bed with my son to make sure he didn't go outside. But when I woke up from that dream, convinced I had just heard that same song, I talked myself out of actually getting into bed with him because that would be crazy.

After I went to check on him and make sure he was still in his bed, of course.

Sunday, May 04, 2008