Monday, February 28, 2005

Sunday, February 27, 2005

I'm stuck

On these lyrics to "Unquiet" by Toad the Wet Sprocket:

I am taught but I
Never learn a thing
I'm not deaf but I
Can't hear everything
A quiet world
I am strong but I
Never move a thing
I have words but I
Lack the voice to sing

A quiet world
I would sell the world
Would I...
I am fast but I
Never move at all
I have sight but I
Never choose to show
A quiet world
I would sell the world
Would I...
A quiet world

It's Sunday, where's the sun?

I think Sunday is my least favorite day of the week. It should be a nice relaxing day but I find myself thinking of it as "the day before I have to go to work". So instead of enjoying the day, I'm more worried about what I need to get done before work tomorrow. Even Mondays are better because at least you know where you stand on a Monday. It's a work day. Sunday is my finish up the housework and laundry day. Blah!
I just poured myself another cup of coffee. I shouldn't have another; when your hands are shaking as you pour the coffee that should be a pretty good indication that you've had enough. Yet I still drink it. I hate dumping coffee, it seems like such a sin to waste it.
I hung out with Terra T on Friday. I told her we should both blog about how much we hated each other but I just can't do it. I had too much fun. I hope she doesn't think I'm a total lush though, I got pretty drunk. It was completely her fault, forcing shots of Patron on me. I swear I was an innocent bystander, she practically twisted my arm off. Really.....
It's cool to have a blogger in the area. And she lives right down the street from me too! I just don't know if I'll be able to keep up with her. Maybe if I learn how to say no to the tequila. I need to say a big THANK YOU to Roy Hobbs for driving my drunk ass home. He's quite a guy, that Roy. Didn't even try to take advantage of me either. (at least not that I can remember...)
Just teasing, Roy. I owe you one.
I've been seeing more and more audioblogging lately. I like it. I think it's funny how people always seem to start their audio posts with "Hey everyone, so-and-so here...." as if we don't know who's talking. I did it too, so I can't really say anything. It's just funny. I won't do it next time though. If I can help myself. Anyway, the dryer just buzzed so......

Friday, February 25, 2005

Insanity is hereditary, isn't it?

I need some advice, blog buddies! My mother is driving me crazy. Here is a little back story.....
My mom hates her sister, we'll call her D. This goes back a long time, they haven't really been on speaking terms for years. I couldn't even tell you why, one reason being I have a very bad memory and the other is I really don't care so much. Anyway, my mom thinks that her daughters need to subscribe to the "your enemy is my enemy" theory. We're not supposed to see D. One sister of mine, E, sees D quite a bit, and this pisses my mom off to no end. What she doesn't know is I occasionally see D as well, I just don't tell mom about it. The reason I will make plans with her is because she has a daughter M who is close to Caden's age and they like each other. I don't think it's a rediculous thing to want Caden to know his cousins, especially since this is the only cousin near his age. Well, technically she's MY cousin, but that's not the point. So my sister E brought up the subject of M being the flower girl for my other sister's wedding. She was stupid enough to mention it TO OUR MOM. I don't know what in the hell she was thinking, sometimes I think she likes to cause drama, but that's not the point either. The point is this. My mom told E that if she continues to see D then mom will effectively shut her out of her life, and told her that my other sister and I will do the same. This makes me angry because my mom has no right to tell my sister that I would EVER cut her out of my life. I would never do that, and my mom is crazy for even thinking it. My problem is that I never stand up to my mom. I just ignore the things she says and pretty much move past it, change the subject, distract her with tales of Caden. It always works, and I get to avoid the drama that way. This thing with my sister is bugging me though, and I want to tell her that it made me mad that she told E that. I just don't know if it's worth it. It will blow up into a big deal, my mom has a way of turning everything into a big war. So do I let this go the way I let everything go? I will eventually forget about it, it's a benefit of the bad memory thing. Or do I stand up for once and tell my mom how I feel?

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Spank is the name of the band

I'm going to see a friend's band Friday night, do a little dancing, a little drinking. Maybe a lot of drinking. Yeah, a lot of drinking. Calling a cab to get home kind of drinking.
This is the email they sent out:

Hi, we'd like to (tequila) invite you to (rock and roll) a little gathering of friends (chicks) on Friday the 25th of (guys) February over at a nice little (Jack Daniels) place in San Jose called the 5th Quarter. The band SPANK will be (Big Beers) performing for your entertainment. Most bands use gimmicks to lure their fans out (women dancing with women) to a show, or even psycho hypnotic brain washing and (Llama Bondage kits and naked Llama booth coupons to first 3 fans) brain washing. Not us, we understand that you have (Johnnie Walker) plenty of other things to do (chuck e Cheese next door) rather than spend a night at a bar listening to some (mini skirts) 2 bit garage band, so we suggest (big huge sets) you spend Friday night the 25th of February (Dancing) starting at 9pm with us....S P A N K!!!! We will (%$#@*&^) rock you on til the wee-hours of the morning. Golly gee, no matter how (bet on drunken earthworm racing) you slice it, we guarantee you will have a swell (Face painting and tongue hammering tent) time. So we'll see you then!!!

Sounds like fun, doesn't it? I just love drunken earthworm racing, what a high. I invited Terra to go, but I haven't heard back yet. I hope she knows I don't take rejection well. Oh, just kidding, Terra. Also: not a stalker. I swear. I don't even know where you live, heh heh heh.

P.S. I love Toad the Wet Sprocket.

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

The concert

Xavier Rudd in two words: Fucking Amazing.
This was one of the best shows I have ever been to. That man is so talented it blew me away. I knew he played all the instruments himself, I just didn't realize he played them all at the same time. He was up there by himself with all his instruments around him playing his little heart out. It sounded like there were five guys up there with him. Have you ever heard a didjeridu?
It is: A musical instrument of the Aboriginal peoples of Australia, consisting of a long hollow branch or stick that makes a deep drone when blown into.
It also sends chills down your spine and makes your heart vibrate when you're in a small room with one. It's a very powerful instrument. Here's a picture of Xavier on stage, this is pretty much what he looked like last night.

Go to Xavier Rudd's website and take a listen. You can listen to his songs and even watch a video. The video is a really cool song called the 12th of September. You will be impressed. His hair looks a little weird, but that doesn't matter, he's still awesome! You may also want to check out his tour schedule. Even if it's not the sort of music you would normally listen to it's still a great show. I even paid $25 for a tank top, that's how good he is.

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Yes, yes, I'm still here.

My life has been very uninteresting these days, so nothing to post about. Late winter blah's maybe? I think a lot of people are experiencing this. The sun finally came out today though, and there are some birds in my backyard either trying to kill each other or getting it on, I can't tell which. I don't think I want to know.
My cable has been out since Friday. I waited until yesterday for it to spontaneously fix itself, but that didn't happen so I finally made the call. They gave me the 8-12 window, so I wrote "Cable guy, 8-12" on my dry erase board. Surprisingly prompt, my cable girl showed up around 10. She went about her business as I discreetly erased the board, not wanting to appear sexist. Why I thought she'd care, I have no idea. Anyway, cable is up and running now and I am getting my $90 worth. Just in time for Scrubs tonight!
I read a comic in the newspaper, a guy was sitting at the computer and the computer said to him "I deleted that so-called creative writing you did last night. Let's stick with accounting" or something like that. The first thought in my head was "he's going to have to back up his writing on a disk from now on" like THAT was the point of the comic. I had to laugh at myself. The way my mind works....
I'm going to San Francisco to see Xavier Rudd tonight. I'm quite excited about this. He is an awesome musician, and the venue is small which always makes a concert better. I have to work early tomorrow so I've offered to be the designated driver. I would never be able to get up at 5:45am if I went out drinking. I'm too old for that. Used to be that I could party the night away and still get to work the next morning but those days are long gone. I'll have to hold out until Friday. Man, this getting old sucks.
I hope everyone enjoyed their weekend, I'll have to snoop around the blogs now and catch up on all your lives. See ya!

Saturday, February 19, 2005

You know what they say about laughter.

You can't have manslaughter without it! (I think I saw that on a T-shirt somewhere) No, I'm kidding, it's the very best medicine. What is it about making someone laugh that can make you feel so good? I just love it when I make people laugh, it's like touching them somehow. We all know laughing feels good, so it's like a present to be able to give that to someone else. Especially when you make someone who you think is really funny laugh. I would have these great three-way conversations with Joel and Ben and I would be cracking up the whole time. (yeah I said three-way, get your minds out of the gutter) On the odd occasion I could make the two of them laugh it was like a great personal accomplishment. It was like, hey I made these two funny people laugh! I was very proud of myself at those moments. Even if there were only one or two of those moments. My son is the same way, too. He loves to make people laugh. He is my son in more ways than just the fact that I gave birth to him. And he was nine and a half pounds at birth so that was no easy feat, I tell you! He's a total ham, always going for the laugh. Unfortunately, he thinks the word butt is hilarious. I'm such an ineffective parent that I end up laughing when he says things like butt-head, too. It's impossible to instill good manners in your kid when you laugh at the rude things he does or says. I'll admit it, I can act like a ten year old boy at times. Potty humor can be funny, right? I'm not alone in this. Otherwise there wouldn't be any Jim Carrey movies and Animal House wouldn't be so popular. But it's not just potty humor that you laugh at with that nagging guilt. It's also the rest of the un-PC humor that we all like but feel bad when we laugh. Mike knows what I'm talking about. Seriously, go read his post and tell me you don't laugh. It's okay, we all did. Midgets are funny too, when Billy Bob Thornton knocked down that midget in the boxing ring in Bad Santa I could have died laughing. I felt slightly guilty laughing at a midget. Not bad enough to stop myself from backing it up and watching it again though. No, I say laugh loud and often. It keeps you young.


I bought my first pair of boyshort underwear. So far I'd have to say thumbs up. I need more time to get used to the feeling that I have shorts on under my jeans though. These may be a skirt kind of underwear and not a jeans kind of underwear. I will give it a chance though because they're cute. I suppose this is what guys go through when they reach a certain age and make that switch from briefs to boxers. It's probably a peculiar feeling for a while then once they get used to it it's impossible to think of ever going back. At least that's what I hear.

Friday, February 18, 2005

So you want to be a writer?

A friend of mine gave me a bunch of books a few weeks ago. I was completely out of reading material so I snatched them up faster than a prostitute takes money off the nightstand. Having finished all of the interesting books in the bag I was left with three books by Nora Roberts. I am a book whore, and I will read most anything I can get my hands on, even Nora Roberts as a last resort. These books are the most rediculous, trite, banal pieces of work I have ever read. And I've read a lot of books. She uses the same formula in every book, at least the three I read. Yeah, I read them all, what can I say. I already admitted I'm a book whore, and trashy smut is better than no smut at all. I mean no book at all. If you would like to be a New York Times bestselling author, all you have to do is follow her method, which I will describe here:

Beautiful Girl has a predisposed notion about Powerful Man. They meet for the first time, he knows who she is, she does not know he is PM whom she dislikes. They share a kiss.

BG: Oh, you scoundrel, you deliberately took advantage!
PM: You're so beautiful when you're angry.

BG works for PM. PM exploits the position of power. They kiss a few more times. BG falls in love with PM. PM loves himself but wants to have sex with BG.

BG: I have to stop loving him because he can never love me; we're from different worlds.
PM: Look at me, I'm a total asshole. But how handsome I am...

BG throws herself into her work trying to forget PM. PM finally does a magnanimous act, proving he isn't a complete asshole.

BG: Oh, how I love you!
PM: Oh, how I love me, I mean you!

BG and PM live happily ever after.

Two final notes: BG must be a virgin and PM must be at least 10 years older than BG.

The End.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

God, I sound like a tard.

this is an audio post - click to play

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Holy cow, check out the shirt I just ordered!

Can you believe I found a shirt this cool? If any of you other squirrels or squirrel lovers would like to order, you can pick one up here. Thanks goes to Adam, for emailing me this link. I will keep an eye open for a squirrel binder for you Ken, but maybe this can fill the void until we locate one. That or a shirt that says Only for Girls. Hee hee.

This is a shirt I ordered a while ago, but I still haven't worn anywhere. I just can't think of the right function for this shirt! I brought it to Florida with me, but since there is a church every two miles, I thought it might be a bad idea. It still cracks me up though. I wonder, what would Jesus do for a Klondike bar? You can get this and many other fabulous shirts at T-Shirt Hell. I totally want the one that says Easy Like Sunday Morning. That's hilarious.

Monday, February 14, 2005


So my car wouldn't start this morning. I took the 4-Runner to work instead. I like driving a bigger car, I feel powerful! I'm not very good at it though. Especially parking. Parking is definitely not my strong point. I get to work and I'm already shopping for a new car. I'm like, if my car is broken I'm TOTALLY getting a Magnum. I like those Magnums. When I was in Florida, Ang and I were talking about cars and she said "You know what car I kind of like?" and I said "The Magnum!" And yeah, she was talking about the Magnum. Funny when you can read someone's mind like that. I was online, shopping for my Magnum, in my head I'm already driving the thing. Turns out I just had no gas in my car. What a dink.

Dude, it's got a Hemi.

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Happy birthday, little sister!

Well, my baby sister is turning 27 this Valentine's Day. Twenty seven. Seems like just a couple years ago she was wearing a cheerleading skirt and just a few years before that we were hiding out in the laundry hamper to avoid our older sister's beatings. I have to say, my life wouldn't be as good as it is now without her in it. She is my best friend in the world. She is someone I can talk to without fear of judgement. She understands me like nobody else, and I am grateful every day to have her as my sister. Plus, she's a whole lot of fun!

We went to Brittania Arms on Friday for an early birthday celebration. Looks like fun, doesn't it? Yeah, Krissy and her buddy El Patron thought so, too.
(left to right: Krissy, Elaina, Cindy)

Happy birthday to the coolest little sister anyone could ask for. I love you.

I'm going to reconsider some stuff

I am going to die at 78. When are you? Click here to find out!

I could stand to shave a few years off this age, huh? Maybe I should engage in some higher risk behavior. Start drinking more, maybe. Have some casual sex. Bungie jump. Hang out with Terra.

Saturday, February 12, 2005

Florida was fun but I'm glad to be home

Well, Florida was great. The weather was perfect, we went to the beach twice. My toes have been missing the sand. It was a good thing we went twice because from the looks of things around here it will be a while before I can get over to the beach in Aptos. Can you believe I came home to this rainy weather? What a buzzkill.
We never made it to Disneyworld. We were too thrown off by the time change, and Monday was the only day we had for that. So add to that the amount of beer consumed at the superbowl party we went to, and there was no getting up early for me.
Beer = fun. Vodka + rum = eeek.
Ang is doing great. Thought you'd all want to know. Oh, and I was wondering if maybe you guys thought Ang was a weird name, so I thought I should let you know her name is Angela but we call her Ang. Because if you call her Angie you risk losing an eye.
We went to Busch Gardens instead, since we woke up so late. It was fun, and guess who I saw there! Yes, I ran into J. That little devil came right up to me and put her little squirrel hand on my sweatshirt.

J came a little too close.

So I threw her some popcorn. I hope she's having a good time in Florida.

Well, it's Saturday now, I've lagged on this post. I keep adding to it then saving as draft again and again. The sun is out today, Florida really has some competition on the weather again. Ok, well I'm finally going to publish this bugger and move on. Florida has lost my interest. We all know I'm a California girl at heart anyway.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Fuck off, Blogger

I have been back from Florida for hours now (although I did take a nap, so you can't count that hour and a half) and I've been unable to post a comment to anyone's blog. So here is my official fuck you to Blogger, I'm adding Haloscan comments. You guys should try it. The only comments I've been able to leave are through this. OK, so I've only left one. Blah.

A proper Florida post will follow, when I've had more coffee.
Also, when Blogger gets over it's hissy fit.

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Friday, February 04, 2005

Bienvenidos a Miami

Well, not Miami exactly, more like Tampa. I'll be gone until next week, I'm off to visit Ang, Mickey Mouse, and the beach. Oh, fun fun fun. I'm very excited. Not so much for the Disneyworld part, although Cat will be appalled to hear it. I'm happy to be going to see Ang. She's my best friend, and she moved to Florida in December of 2001. I've only been out there once, for Halloween 2003. Or was it 2002? I can't remember, but it was FUN. That was the trip where the airline tried to kill me, twice. First by having an engine go out, and having to make the emergency landing in Nashville. Then, by having me late for the connection in Dallas, forcing me to spend the night. In a DRY COUNTY. That's right people, places where they don't sell alcohol! At all! Not a drop, not a shot, not a single beer for a weary traveler doomed to spend the night in Texas. Fuck those people, I've got a direct flight there, and one stop in Colorado on the way home. Colorado may suck ass, but it's better than Texas, and I bet you can find some beer there.
So I'm off again, my little ones. I hope you all take care of each other while I'm gone. I will leave you with a few items about Ang, and why I love her.

*She was always willing to pack up and go somewhere at a moments notice. LA, San Luis, Santa Barbara, it didn't matter. We'd grab some beer, some cloves, a pair of shorts and head out.
*Once I broke the cooler and it poured ice cold water all over her ass in the car, and she didn't even get mad at me.
*We dressed as Thing One and Thing Two for Halloween (years ago)
*She went to school in Fresno, but she'd still come home every weekend to see me.
*She wore a dress to be in my wedding. Huge for Ang.
*When my car broke she let me use hers all day while she was at work.
*She showed me the joys of Coors Light, Diet Coke and Djarum Specials.
*She let me cry on her shoulder, even before we were friends.
*I could always talk shit in bars because I could depend on her to have my back. And she can actually fight, unlike me.
*She taught me how to play Three Man.
*We spent so much time together people thought we were dating, but neither one of us cared that much.

See you on Thursday! Have fun, my friends. Don't rob my house, ok?

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Thursday, February 3rd

I try to set a good example for my son. I really do. I eat more vegetables than I normally would, in an attempt to show him they vegetables are not in fact sent by the devil to kill us. I don't swear, I don't watch violent shows when he's around, I share. So why do I feel bad eating macaroni and cheese with Fritos for breakfast? I fed him a waffle with peanut butter on it, so it's not like I gave him the same breakfast I had. Yet I still felt I had to hide my own food from him. Oh, also, if you eat breakfast at 11:30, is it still breakfast or has it become lunch, making the three cups of coffee you had earlier your actual breakfast?

Caden and I washed my car today. I know I'm making all you sun-deprived people out there very jealous but oh my goodness, it is beautiful. I actually had to change into shorts because I was too hot. It's so awesome. And my car is clean. What a day.

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Me: Today

Deeply, often wistfully or dreamily thoughtful.
Suggestive or expressive of melancholy thoughtfulness.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Spring has sprung

At least for a little while, it's spring in San Jose.
I sat in the sun and finished my book.
I sat in the sun and ate macaroni and cheese.
I sat in the sun and pulled my jeans up over my knees and said "damn I'm white".
I sat in the sun and painted my toenails.
I sat in the sun and flexed my bicep and contemplated how pathetically weak I am.
I sat in the sun and talked with Caden.
I sat in the sun and just....sat.
I also hit some plastic balls around the yard with Caden and as usual started singing "I did it like this, I did it like that, I did it with a wiffle ball bat so........"
I love spring.

Hello darkness, my old friend

Well, my dad is gone and there are no visitors today and I am happy about that. My house is quiet, it's just Caden and me today. Ahhhhhh.......silence.
The sun is out and it is GORGEOUS outside today. I just wanted to do a quick post then I'm headed outside to enjoy the day. The sun rejuvenates me.

I know you guys can't tell but this is Caden in front of the jellyfish tank.
We went to the Monterey Bay aquarium on Sunday. It was fun, although the girls were a bit tired due to the fact that my little sister somehow convinced us it would be a good idea to go dancing Saturday night. We stayed out late and got up way too early. But what a fun night we had! We danced and drank and laughed, laughed, laughed. There was almost a fight, a drunken disclosure, for some reason the whole place was filled with short people, I felt like a giant at 5'7".
Jeff Garcia was there, and I was completely convinced he played for the Giants. My sister tried to tell me he was a 49er, but I didn't believe her. I do now.
Well, it's 11am and time to go outside. Good day, Sunshine!

(wait....I'M Sunshine!)

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