She's all laughing and saying "moded"

Terra sent me an email titled "squirrel" but it was completely blank. What kind of a cruel joke is that, huh?

Well, it's Friday

Ok, techically it's not Friday here, but it's Friday, I'm in love.
I mean, it's Friday elsewhere.

I totally flaked on HNT this week. Oh bother. I was busy, ok guys? I had to take Caden for allergy testing. I don't know which one of us cried more.

Wait, I don't cry. That's right. It must have been him.

I have put up an appropriate Friday song for y'all. I hope it makes you all feel like drinking tonight. I will be drinking tonight. This is a promise to you, my internet friends. You can count on me for that, at the very least. You may not be able to depend on my participation in FBF or HNT or actually answering questions or continuing the 10 turn ons/offs (sorry, Kunst) but you can rely on me to drink Friday, July 29th, 2005. I don't really know what's in store for me tonight, but I know I will need beer to get through it. Beer and Terra. I will also need beer to get through the A's game I have to go to on Saturday. I know, me at a baseball game. The last time I went to a sporting event....let's see....maybe it was that Shark's game? In like, 1995? I can't even tell you who won the game, either. I can tell you that beer was $6.

The Blood Center called me again today. Because today was the day I became eligible to donate again. I set an appointment for next week. I decided that since Trevor looked so blissful giving blood that I should do it again, see if I get this happy. Although, since I made the mistake of actually LOOKING at the needle last time I somehow doubt it. I was happy in my ignorance. I was content not knowing that they were coming at my arm with a piece of sawed off PVC pipe.

(I just went through this post and added as many links as I could)
(and changed the date so this says Friday)
(thank you and good night)

You're not the boss of me

What the fuck is up with Haloscan? Why does it have such a fucking problem with me posting a comment within thirty seconds? Sometimes I feel like posting a comment right after I posted one, so fucking what. Who made Haloscan the ruler of the world? I want to find out who decided on that thirty second rule and go to his house. I would ask him why he decided to make it so you had to wait thirty seconds between comments. Then when he started to tell me I'd interrupt him: Ah! Please wait another twenty seconds. Then he'd open his mouth to try to tell me again and I'd say: Shhh! Another fifteen seconds. Every time he'd start a sentence I would interrupt him; shush, quiet, stop, hey now, shut it, until I drove him absolutely crazy. I'd sit there as long as it took to make him completely hate me. It probably wouldn't take long. You've all seen Austin Powers, how long did you watch Mike Myers do that to Seth Green before you said to whoever was with you "I'd fucking punch that guy in the mouth"? Not long, if you're anything like me. Although, I also couldn't stand the movie Anger Management because about a third of the way into it I was ready to reach through the screen and strangle Jack Nicholson. There is no way in hell a person would be able to take that shit. No fucking way.

Just a quickie

They opened a new Quizno's at the corner of Snell and Blossom Hill. (see this post for reference) They have a giant red balloon that they put out every day, it's huge and Caden loves it. Every time we drive by he yells out "Red balloon!" and I answer "Are there 99?" and he says no. Today he asked me "Are you going to say that every time?" and I laughed so hard.



***Update***

Tonight we were driving home from OJ's (mmmmm, OJ's) and there was a red balloon just floating on the side of the road. I said "Red balloon!" and Caden said "Are there 99?" My kid rocks.

Side note: Balloons floating randomly on the side of the road freak me out. Once I was driving back over the hill from Santa Cruz by myself at like midnight and there was a purple balloon just floating in the middle of the freeway. It freaked me the hell out, I locked my doors and looked back to make sure there was nobody in my backseat. I kept expecting to see Pennywise in my rearview mirror. Ok, I'm freaking myself out right now. Shit.

Question

Do you think my sister would be mad if I entered her in the Miss San Jose Grand Prix pageant? Do you think it would be worth it?

If

James Stewart
May 20, 1908 - July 2, 1997





If I had a time machine I would travel back to the 1930's and hang out at Hearst Castle with Jimmy Stewart. I would make him my boyfriend. We would eat in the big dining room with the beautiful wooden ceiling. We would watch movies in the theater and hold hands. Maybe watch one of his movies, wouldn't that be cool? The earliest one I've actually seen is You Can't Take It With You, which came out in 1938, so the earlier ones would be new to me. Good thing, too, since I'm coming from the future, it would be weird for me to talk about It's A Wonderful Life. I might even try tennis, if he wanted to play. We would swing dance and I think we would drink gin.


I would swim in this pool with my new boyfriend. Can you imagine floating on your back staring up at that gorgeous California sky? I would wear one of those 1930's bathing suits, those things are so cool. Charlie Chaplin wouldn't swim though, I think he'd be sitting on a lounge chair smoking a cigar with a drink in his hand. Whiskey, I bet. He probably wouldn't play tennis either, he doesn't strike me as the athletic type. Plus, he's probably trip and fall.

At night, after everyone else went to bed, Jimmy and I would sneak into the indoor pool. We would go skinny dipping in the dark. The lights reflect on the gold in the tiles. Everything echos in that pool room, so we would have to be very quiet. After playing Marco Polo for a while we would go back to the Casa Del Monte guesthouse, have a nightcap, and play checkers. Yup, checkers. Maybe Monopoly, it came out in 1935. Then we would put on our long nightgowns and go to bed. Get your minds out of the gutter, I can't have sex with Jimmy Stewart! That would just be wrong.

Lyrics question

Ok, I just put Shelter by Xavier Rudd on my Song of the Day thingy over to the right. I'd appreciate someone telling me what he says after the doo doo doo. I have not been able to figure it out and it's been bugging me.

Doo doo doo
.....Ornamental.....?
Doo doo doo
.....Elemental.....?
Doo doo doo
.....In the middle.....?
Doo doo doo
.....And I'm mental.....?




Also, is this not one of the funniest things you've ever seen? Not only is that cat the most awesome looking cat ever, but it's all disproportionate, he looks like a little miniature cat, leading to even more hilarity.


Or maybe I was high when I saw it.
Who really knows.

Quick

Follow this link.

Do it.
Except Duckie and Suburbite and Jake, you've already seen it.

Look what Caden made for me

(that's me, in case you couldn't tell)

Happy HNT

For Suburbite.

You know, I feel like we would get better quality pictures if we did this once a month instead of every week. At least that would be true for me because I might actually think about it ahead of time instead of that morning. Oh well.

Nicky tagged me

See Ty, I can play nice when I want to.

10 years ago today: I had just turned 21 so obviously, drinking was a big part of my life. I spent many nights drunk at either the Kappa Sigma house or the Phi Beta Kappa house. Playing 3 Man, Passout, Thumper, running through the fountain at SJ State, hijacking the golf carts, occasionally going to classes, and I was newly engaged.

5 years ago today: My first summer of homeownership. Great parties, we even set up a volleyball net in the back, it was almost like summer camp. Until I got pregnant, or at least until I found out I was pregnant.

1 year ago today: Pretty much the same as right now.

Yesterday: I got my hair dyed red again and had my eyebrows done.

Tomorrow: is a Stay At Home With Mommy Day. Big plans may or may not include Costco (coffee, chicken, oregano), Mervyns (underwear), and/or Barnes and Noble (Harry Potter).

5 snacks I enjoy: Chili Cheese Fritos, ice cream, Cheez-its and cream cheese, regular Fritos with cottage cheese, Twix.

5 bands that I know the lyrics to most of their songs: The Cure, Toad the Wet Sprocket, The Beatles, um, that's about it.

5 things I would do with $100,000,000: I really can't say.

5 locations I'd like to run away to: Anything near the ocean. Ok, the Pacific Ocean. Ok, not anywhere. Maybe Aptos.

5 bad habits I have: Me? Bad habits? I have like 1000.

5 things I like doing: Reading, talking, drinking, sitting in the sun, taking pictures.

5 things I would never wear: Spike heels, too much makeup (or any as the case may be most of the time) tiny skirts, tube tops, or anything lime green.
(I'm just leaving Nicky's answer here, although I may have been known to occasionally wear lime green, I'll deny it now)

5 TV shows I like: Scrubs, Smallville, Nip/Tuck, the Dead Zone, Carnivale.

5 movies I like: It's A Wonderful Life, The Outsiders, Amelie, X-Men, Napoleon Dynamite.

5 famous people I'd like to meet: Eminem, Harrison Ford, Yoko Ono, Audrey Tautou, Blog Ho.

5 biggest joys of the moment: Of this particular moment? Um, I'm not dead?

5 favorite toys: THE Mustang, my cameras, the pool, my computer, and Caden.

5 people to tag: Anyone who feels like doing this.

What the hell

I'm so fucking busy today I can't even breathe.
What the fuck?
It's like I'm being punished for not doing SHIT on Monday.


Um, ya think?

Death by stereo

One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach...
All the damn vampires.


I went to Santa Cruz this weekend. We went to the Boardwalk and rode a couple rides. I had to ride the Giant Dipper by myself because Caden didn't meet the height requirement. I rode with some kid, we laughed and laughed, it was cool. It just isn't right to go to the Boardwalk and NOT ride the Giant Dipper.





I know you can't see this guy very well, but I wanted to take his picture because they showed him during the credits at the beginning of the Lost Boys. Plus I just think he's cool.







We took Caden to dinner first, he was such a little monster.
But at least he's entertaining.

Warning:

Do not look directly at the picture below.
Retinal damage may occur.

As close as I'll ever get to the sun.

Searches

#9 on a Yahoo Canada search for "bag ok milk"

#11 on a Sympatico search for "drunk milf"
side note: right below the search line it says "buy and sell drunk milf on ebay"

cindy-lou likes kiddie porn

My buddy

Flash likes kitty porn.

Remember:

There's always Google News if you're looking for something to read.

Analyze This

I saw a car on my way to work this morning with a sign in the back window that said “FREE PRAYER”. It was a cardboard sign with block letters written in black marker. It looked like the sort of sign a panhandler would hold. Help me, because I can’t quite figure something out. Does it mean “FREE PRAYER” in the “Free Winona” sense? Like, prayer needs to be freed from some prison? You know, I always suspected prayer of being a criminal. Or maybe it means “FREE PRAYER” as in “I’m giving away free prayers. First come, first serve”. That would actually be a good idea because you know how much people like to get free stuff.

Boring, I know. Blame Darrel.

Hand under water for HNT.

Three posts in one day? WTF?

These co-workers of mine. Jeez. They think I'm crazy. Little Miss OCD. They also think I'm high all the time because I laugh a lot, but that's a different story. So today.....

Someone gave me a loan application and their paystubs were copied onto legal sized paper. Everything else in the file is regular old 8 1/2 by 11. They had folded the paper so it would fit with the other ones but it just wasn't right. So I re-copied the paystubs onto regular sized paper. Apparently this is insane behavior. They're ready to drop me off at Agnews, dude. Whatever. It bugged me and now it's nice and even. I'm not crazy, I'm precise. Right? right....


Next:
What would you say if someone told you they had never heard of using the word "nip" as a racial slur? Would you accuse them of lying? I did, too.

I know, right?

Is there any use for Jennifer Love Hewitt?
I mean really, does anyone have a use for Jennifer Love Hewitt?

Except maybe like this.....

Question

Does anybody else find it unnerving when there are three Fed Ex trucks parked outside your building?

I have

a guest blogger in town.

the truth

cindy eats her own boogers

Quoted

What good is it being the sun without the moon to shine on?

Mystery books

I just finished one of my mystery books, The Secret Life of Bees. By the way, mystery solved, they were from my mother in law. I guess people know me well, I got books from her, from my husband, a Borders gift card from work, and a Barnes & Noble gift card from my dad. Can you tell I like to read? Anyway, it was a good book, a little girly but I liked it. I was reading it outside the other day and a bee was hovering around me. It disappeared and I thought it went up my pant leg. It didn't, but I thought about how funny it would be if I was stung by a bee while reading The Secret Life of Bees. Well, not funny haha-funny, but funny ironic-funny.

I think I feel like a worker bee. No goal, no accomplishment, no end in sight, just the same shit day after day. I'm a drone.








I want to be the queen.

made me laugh

I had to share these. Someone found my blog through a search for "cynthia is a really cool dancer". What the hell?
Also, someone searched for "ho darkness my friend". Now, I know what they meant, hello darkness my old friend, but that's funny. Blog Ho, was that one of your friends?

Hottie made human

The monster doesn't
like it when we tell him he
looks like a new kid.


But he does.

Duckie is the artist

I finally put Duckie's art on my wall.
Isn't it beautiful?

Haiku for YOU

My violent Ty,
The world needs your words tonight.
Please don't hide away.

I wonder

Do you think if someone did a Google search for CINDY LOU that they were looking for me? Because they found me. I wonder.....

HNT

I tell you, I'm useless. Without Darrel's guidance I'm lost. Darrel, what the heck is going on, it's Thursday and you have nothing for me to work with. I'm searching through the HNT submissions, trying to come up with an idea, I got nothin'.
I can't do a 4th of July themed HNT because I didn't take a single picture that day. I can't do a cool eye picture because, well I'm retarded. Plus, you've already seen my eyes on a previous HNT. So I looked around my body, trying to find something of interest.

There is nothing of interest.

Nothing of interest that I will show you, anyway.

So here's a picture of my knee scars. My knees used to pop out of socket all the time so they moved some shit around and screwed them back in. Knees suck.











Happy HNT everybody!

I'm getting stronger.

I'm a tropical storm!
and I have a friend named Dennis!

Watch out people, I'm coming.



Cindy Heads Toward Gulf Coast

NEW ORLEANS (July 5) - Scattered rain fell in southeastern Louisiana on Tuesday and officials took precautions as Tropical Storm Cindy headed toward land, while another tropical storm formed in the Caribbean and could hit Florida later in the week.

Cindy, which had crossed Mexico's Yucatan Peninsula as a tropical depression, grew to tropical storm strength early Tuesday and had sustained wind of 50 mph by 11 a.m. Also by late morning, Tropical Storm Dennis formed with wind of 40 mph. The minimum for a tropical storm is 39 mph.

(see that, Dennis isn't as strong as I am. weaker sex my ass)

Let's see, who's in my path of destruction?
YoJ? Darrel? David?
Be afraid.

I wanted to buy this shirt that said

Good girls go to heaven
Bad girls go to Montreal.

But I didn't.

I would like to tell you that I'll post extensively about my trip but we all know I'm too lazy for that and you probably don't want to read it anyway so I'll just give you the highlights.




First weird thing about Canada:
Popcorn on the table when you eat dinner.
(I guess it's not a Canadian thing per say, just that particular restaurant. However, I have never seen it before so I'm going with weird Canadian thing)







Next weird thing about Canada:
Milk in bags. With special pitchers for pouring.
(and you didn't believe me)







(side note: yeah this new picture thing blogger has rocks. Totally. NO sarcasm at all in my voice)

I didn't get a picture of the fries with curdled cheese on it. You heard me, CURDLED CHEESE. Isn't that just code for rotten milk? I refused to try it. Anyway...



Cat and I drank some beer.
Then I drank more.
and more.







Sunset was really cool on Canada Day. Apparently, everything is cool on Canada Day.





This kid called me a MILF. Because I was THIRTEEN YEARS OLDER THAN HE WAS. You only have to be 18 to drink there. Children in bars, and there I was wishing I was a pedophile.





It's always a good idea to make friends with the bartender. Especially the young, cute ones. Thanks for all the free drinks, Aaron. You made my birthday special.
(I think)





(someone needs to teach Val that when I get drunk I like to take pictures with boys and need to be restrained. someone should also teach Terra that trick)


I may have been slightly hung over here, having stayed up until 4am drinking. But I wanted to show off the shirts.






I was waiting and waiting for Ty to show up, but alas...no Ty. Cat had a place card for him and everything.
Bad Ty!






Other highlights of the trip:

I got really confused by the "kiss on both cheeks" thing and kissed Cat's dad right on the lips. It was extremely embarrassing and awesome all at once.

I slept very little, ate very little, and drank a whole lot. That pretty much sums up the trip!

I love Cat and the Head with all my heart. They are two very cool people and I feel very lucky to have been able to share their special day. Even if Cat did accuse me of running off with the busboy in front of everyone at the reception.

The End

Canada

Ok, all I have to say is...

milk in a bag?

what?