I can....almost....reach it....

So, I was driving down the street today. It's hot here right now, really hot. Windows open, sunglasses on. Full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes...oh wait, that's not my life, that's a movie. Anyway, you know how when it's beautiful outside you automatically crave a beer? You start imagining how it looks, ice cold from a cooler, dripping with water; and the more you think about it the more you want it? (please say you know what I mean) So I'm having these thoughts and what do you think I pull up behind? A Coors Light truck. There's a frosty bottle of beer on the back and above it it reads: Would you like a beer? I shouted "YES!"
But nobody gave me one. It was all a big lie. Coors is bent on destroying me. Assholes.

Well, it's begun.

The annual "see how many things you can make with hardboiled eggs" drive.

porn is funny

I was talking to my friend about porn this morning. Pretty random 8am topic of discussion, I know. We were talking about movies and Netflix and the conversation made its way around to porn, as conversations tend to do. I said I saw a porn movie at the liquor store for $20 and wondered who would pay $20 for VHS porn.Then he said "I bought some porn for Jack* and Bobby* for helping me move. I got them Barely Legal; they were $32 each. Of course, that's for like six hours of porn but come on!" I think that's pretty much the funniest thing I've heard so far this year. Apparently within his circle of friends they have the "Two P Rule" when it comes to helping each other move: Pizza and Porn. I think if everyone adopted this rule you'd have more people willing to help you move, don't you think?



*names changed to protect the innocent. or not so innocent, as the case may be.

Another one MIA

Has anyone seen Suburbite? His blog seems to have been abducted.
I think I saw his face on a milk carton today. If he's a 15 year old Hispanic girl who has been digitally aged to show what she will look like present day, that is.

You want me to write, fine I'll write.

The name Crazy Al didn't come out of nowhere. It may have started when we caught him smoking weed in his sleeping bag at 6am and saying good morning to a duck. It may have started when we were river rafting and we hit the side of a boulder the size of a truck, and he was hooting and hollering like an indian on the warpath. It may have started with any number of remembered incidents but I think Crazy Al was Crazy Al way back when he was just Alan. He was wild and crazy and he lived his life like an Eagles song.
He also had the biggest heart you could imagine. He loved his friends and family with the same passion he applied toward every facet of life. He'd always open your beer before handing it to you. He'd always make you smile when you needed it. He taught each of us a lesson about living life to it's fullest and enjoying every moment. He was always going too fast; in his car, on his motorcycle, in his go-cart that he built. I believe that he wanted to experience everything, and knew he had a limited amount of time to do it. He even talked too fast. Like he had so much to say and could never depend on people sticking around to listen until he was finished.
He was 33 when he hit that lightpost going 35 miles an hour on his motorcycle. Three years ago this month. I listened to the stories and watched grown men cry and thought about all the ways we touch and learn from each other in this world. "Never take it for granted" he told me one time. I stood outside and cried and remembered him alone.

It's a Wonderful Life.

You know what I was thinking of this morning as I drove to work? I was thinking how I wished George Bailey would have been able to build his bridges and skyscrapers in the end. It would have been nice to know that he eventually achieved his dream. I know the point of the movie was to appreciate what you have, but the poor guy saved for four years to go to college and ended up using the money to send his brother instead. He really deserved a better ending.

"I'm shakin' the dust of this crummy little town off my feet and I'm gonna see the world. Italy, Greece, the Parthenon, the Colosseum. Then, I'm comin' back here to go to college and see what they know. And then I'm gonna build things. I'm gonna build airfields, I'm gonna build skyscrapers a hundred stories high, I'm gonna build bridges a mile long..."

He was so excited. It's a little sad to me that he never got to do it.

The conversation went like this:

Husband: Did you go to the Pink Poodle and put your hands on a stripper about a year and a half ago?
Me: Uh....yeah. (fucking J, dude, why do you have to give me up like that) She took my hands and put them on her.
Husband: Huh. Interesting. I should be home in about an hour.
Me: Ok, see ya.

By far the weirdest conversation I've had in a while. Good times. By the way, if I'm conveying anger or irritation here it's unintentional. This was highly amusing.

Raining again.

But at least I know where I stand when it's raining. My mood will suck and that's that. Yesterday the weather couldn't make up it's mind and I felt a little schizophrenic. It was like this:
Left work it was sprinkling: Mildly irritated
Got to Fed Ex it was raining: Irritated
Got to Target sun was out: Happy
Left Target it was pouring: Pissed off

I sat in my car and said outloud "How is a girl supposed to know what mood to be in when the weather keeps changing?"

Yeah, I sit in my car and talk to myself, so what?
I also just asked my cat if it was raining.

Aw, how sweet

I got this email today from a very old friend of mine. Not that she's old, just that we've been friends for longer than we haven't.

I'm listening to KFOG, and just heard, Hurt so Good, American Girl, and Played it on the Radio (Joe Jackson). Needless to say, I'm thinking of you!

How cute, huh?

Top ten reasons I'm grumpy

1. My sunshine disappeared and now it's windy and rainy.

2. I had to get up too early to hide Easter eggs.
(wait did I say me? I meant the Easter Bunny)

3. I've taken enough Motrin to choke a horse and my left knee is still killing me. (see #1)

4. I just took my last 3 Motrin.

5. Caden started coughing and his pediatrician (whom I adore) is retiring.

6. All the medication I'm on is apparently altering my tastebuds because Diet Coke tastes weird to me all of the sudden.

7. I'm afraid to get my next phone bill.

8. I have a headache.

9. I'm so very bored.

10. And apparently just because I'm a girl.

We took Pete out for a beer last night. My sister bought him some flowers. What can I say, she gets sentimental when she's drunk.

Ok, but seriously. How funny is this?

Check out the big brains on Cindy.

Look what I did! Now you no longer have to have to hold your conversations in my comments section, you can do it right over there in my new shoutbox.
Try it, you'll like it.

And please click here.

And for the more religious readers, click here.

I can't help it, this one's cute too.

Will you please look at how gosh darn cute my kid is? (when he's sleeping)

I find myself brushing my hand along his cheek or down his nose. I hold onto his hand.
I just can't keep my hands off him. He's so cute and so sweet and so full of love.
He also has the greatest laugh.
Sometimes I just can't believe how lucky I am to have such a perfect son.

Friday

Terra, Roy, DJ:

I can no longer sit in this house.
I have to get out or I will go insane.
I'm not contagious anymore.

That being said, Spank is playing at the 5th Quarter tomorrow.

**Also: Cat, is your blog MIA?
Blog on the run.....blog on the run.....

Comments

I've noticed a trend happening with the Haloscan comments. Everyone is all over the comments now that we can comment again. People are commenting multiple times (multiple comments? whew, it's good to be a woman) people are having conversations through the comments on a third person's blog, asking questions, answering questions. It's like we were just released from prison and we hit the Sunday brunch buffet over at Las Guitarras. (mexican restaurant by my mom's house, AWESOME Sunday champagne brunch) Haloscan makes blogging fun again.

Couldn't think of another story, so all you get is some pictures and my sorry ass comments.

Please, Cat, it's so cold out here.


Oh my god Terra, did you just say "does your mom drop it like that"?


A place to hold the blogger company picnic maybe? We can only have so many functions in my backyard.


Someday, EJ will be president. This will be a momentous occasion as she will not only be the first woman president but the first squirrel president as well.


Unfortunately, the title of first monkey president has already been taken.


Oh Cindy, quit being so unpatriotic. You're an asshole. Bush rules. Bush is back? Something like that.


Sadly, Sheila gets many young squirrels hooked on heroin this way. Damn you, Sheila!


A squirrel's brain. Yeah, this doesn't look good.


This is me when I've run out of money at the bar.


Aw, squirrels need love, too. Hidden behind the grass kind of love.


Yo J, thanks for letting me use your skateboard.
Hang on a sec Ken, I'm trying to get that cop's attention.


Is this a warning or the chalk outline of a murdered squirrel? Or both?


This I just thought was cool. Nice ending, don't you think?

Call the CDF

So I finally caved and went to the doctor. My doctor is kind of a hippie and she's very stingy with the antibiotics. She acts like they're coming right out of her pocket. She has her "theories" about over-medicating. Whatever.
I'm kidding, I agree that people shouldn't take antibiotics for every little thing. But does she have to act like I'm stealing from her own personal stash?
Anyway, she thinks it's pneumonia. I got a shot in the arm, two breathing treatments because the first one didn't work, antibiotics (hallelujah), prescriptions for Advair, albuterol, and prednesone, and I had to go to the hospital for a chest x-ray. Holy shit, huh? The weird thing is I don't even feel that bad, I just cough up a lung every now and then. Especially when I laugh. Which ironically, isn't funny.
Did you know that when you have a chest x-ray they make you put little stickers on your nipples? The stickers have little metal balls that show up as white dots in the x-ray, that way if they do see your nipple in the x-ray they don't call you and say "we're very sorry, you have cancer". I don't think the x-ray tech was very comfortable saying the word nipple to me, but he was sure as hell comfortable manipulating my body for the "perfect" position. Or maybe this was a special x-ray tech, like Joey and his tailor. Oh, and he said I have nice, big.....lungs.
Really. Apparently some people have small lungs and some people have big ones. I think it's a good thing, right? I don't have to join the carnival quite yet?
So I will be home tomorrow. No work for me. Not because I don't feel up to going but because nobody wants me there. What, you get an infectuous disease and all of the sudden nobody wants to be around you? Sheesh.

Who's house? Run's house.

Does anyone else get the urge to sing You be Illin' when you see J's comments around?

"Yo J"
widee widee wee
widee wee weer
(that's scratching, in case you didn't know)

The strangest thing just happened

I was in the backyard and it started to rain. I could look to the right and see a bunch of raindrops, look to the left and see just a few raindrops, and it wasn't raining on me at all. Also, the sun was out.
Weird.

Did you hear they're starting a new reality show with Farah Fawcett? Does anyone really care about Farah Fawcett? Is anyone else bothered by the name Fawcett?

I love to sit in my chair on Sundays and look through the ads that come in the newspaper. First, I set everything on the ottoman and go through it, separating the ads I read from the ones I don't care about. OCD, you know. Then I flip through the "good" ads. I always start at the end though and turn the pages backwards. Just a habit. They're having a great sale on hair products at JCPenneys. I don't shop at JCPenneys though. I don't know why. I'm not fundamentally against JCPenneys. It may have something to do with the fact that I don't know where there is a JCPenneys around here, but I'm pretty sure if I wanted to find out I could. I'm a smart girl. Every time I see JCPenneys I'm reminded of a girl I used to be friends with in third grade, her initials are JCP. Funny how those things stick with you. I think I'd like to see how many times I can write JCPenneys in one post. The other half of the paper is still in the driveway. You know, the part that actually contains the news? I used to care about it when Dave Barry had a column, but he's a damn quitter and the guy they replaced him with isn't nearly as funny. Definitely not worth going out there and risking a conversation with my neighbors at 7:30am.

I love coffee.
I love the sun.
I love that my house is silent right now.

Bitches and Gentlemen, it's showtime!

Hurry, hurry, step right up. Introducing the star of our show, his name is blogger.
(Am I getting a little carried away with the Eminem quotes lately, or what?)

Ok, I think I've done all I can to the Blogger CD. I apologize if your song did not make it. I was unable to convert any iTunes songs, and I had so many that I could only use one song per person, so if you sent me more than one I just chose the one I liked the best. The only exception to that rule would be Grace. Not because I love her more than the rest of you, but because she sent two rad songs that I couldn't choose between. So OFFICIALLY one of the songs is my pick and one is hers, since I couldn't even choose one for myself. (don't get a big head over this, Grace) I may have also taken a few liberties with the songs, some of them I was sent a while ago and just decided to use them and attach your name to it. (Cat, Ian, etc.) They are all from fellow bloggers, however, so I'm sticking to the original plan. You know me, always keeping it real. If you'd like a copy of the CD just email me an address to send it to. chamil10@aol.com I don't know how to get all fancy with the labels and shit so it's just going to have Blogger CD written on it with a Sharpie. I love Sharpies. If it's good enough for me, it's good enough for you! If you ever feel like reciprocating, you can burn me a CD of your choice. I promise not to sell your address to a marketing company. I cannot, however, promise I won't stalk you. Sometimes when I read your blogs I get a little out of control.

So without further ado, I bring to you....

The best CD a bunch of bloggers could come up with.

1. Eric B is President byEric B and Rakim, 8zero8
2. E-Pro by Beck, Cindy-Lou (thanks, Grace!)
3. Whitfield by Atomship, Ken Kenniff
4. In the Shadows by The Rasmus, Joanne
5. Pretend We're Dead by L7, JD Namroh
6. Ban Marriage by Hidden Cameras, Joel
7. No Ring on These Fingers by The Bravery, El Sid
8. Weapon by Matthew Good, Building
9. Jaded by Melissa McClelland, Cat
10. Full of Grace by Sarah McLachlan, EJ
11. Sacrifice by Anouk, Just a Girl
12. Stop Your Crying by Spiritualized, Chris-Face
13. When I See You Smile by Bic Runga, Ian
14. Spin by Lifehouse, Veronica
15. Find Me, Ruben Oliveras by Mark Kozelek, Duckie
16. Wind by Child's Play, YankeeBob
17. Six Days by DJ Shadow, Grace
18. Alright by John Legend, TerraT
19. Yeah by Usher, Roy Hobbs

Tell me something

Did I really just see spinners on a minivan?

I just realized something

All this talk about the Blogger CD, and I haven't even decided what song to put on for my pick. I do know, however, that whatever I choose will be in mp3 format and not iTunes. I'm so good to me. I'm still trying to get "There She Goes" by the La's and "Ol' 55" by Tom Waits. Anyone? Anyone? Non-iTunes format? Please?

The iPod is ruining my life.

Week of Fears

On Sunday I was cleaning up around the house. I lifted some newspaper off the table and there was a spider underneath. It was just sitting there, it didn't move at all. It was so big that I stared at it for a minute wondering if it was one of the plastic bugs Caden has. I finally decided it was real and went to the backdoor to yell for my husband. He came running in thinking I was dying. I got yelled at a little bit for that one. When I got back it was gone. He found it and killed it, but I still had that squirmy, crawling all over me feeling for a while. I kept shaking my hair and clothes, making sure there was no spider on me. Big, reddish, kind of see-through spider. Ugh.
Fear #1: spiders

On Monday I was here at the computer while my husband was working on the front room. He had to cut the power to that room to work on the lights but ended up accidentally cutting the power to the whole house. I sat here in the pitch black room, frozen. I could feel my heart speed up and my breathing speed up. Finally, what seemed like hours later, the lights came back on. I heard a "sorry" from the other room. He got yelled at a little bit for that one.
Fear #2: the dark

Thank goodness I escaped my dentist appointment yesterday, that would have just been too much for me to handle. I could just imagine the rest of my week.

Tuesday: dentist
Wednesday: pop-open can of biscuits
Thursday: airplane

What's next, cancer on Friday?

Illegal music

I am LOVING my blogger music! It makes me dance. It's funny because a lot of the songs are stuff I would never chose to listen to, yet I'm enjoying them a lot. I've never been an R&B person, but I like the two I got. I'm not so much a rap person or a metal person but I really like those songs too. Just goes to show that opening your mind can pay off. I should try it more often. Just not with food.

Waiting on a couple more songs, then you can all share my happiness.

I'm home sick today. Nobody is allowed to make me laugh because it makes me cough. So, can you all be boring please? My lungs will thank you.
Does coffee count as fluids when you're sick?

Pick up the red phone, dammit!

I've never been so happy to be sick in my life. This cold has granted me temporary reprieve from the dentist. Even that word makes me shudder. I was supposed to have a teeth cleaning today but I cancelled because I'm sure they don't want my germ-infested mouth anywhere near them. Plus, my sister was supposed to watch Caden but she was just informed she has strep throat. (Ok, happy to have a cold, will not be happy if I have strep) When I flipped the calendar to March and noticed the appointment my stomach instantly recoiled and I thought I was going to vomit. The DENTIST???? NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Thank goodness for the virus. My tension level has been steadily increasing all month. Now I can sit back and relax. Thank you cold virus. I'll gladly take your headache, your phlegm, your cough. I'll give you my energy. I'll give you my appetite. I have to repay you somehow.
I know that I will inevitably have to call back and reschedule the appointment. For now though, I'm just going to enjoy the time I have. I feel like Arnold called that red phone right before they flipped the switch. Thank you, Arnold. Hooray for my stay of execution.
Going to the dentist for me is like spending time at the gym. By the time I leave my muscles are sore from being tensed up the entire time. Even my toes are tense. I also have little crescents dug into my skin everywhere from my fingernails. It's quite appealing. Palms, backs of my hands, arms, wherever my hands happen to be. I don't even realize I'm doing it. Never thought of myself as a self-mutilation kind of girl. The dentist I have now is very understanding, however, and has done what he can to make me more comfortable.
Before:

Dentist: Hi Cindy, I'm just going to....are you ok?
Cindy: Is it the tears? The tears gave it away, right? Yeah, ok I'm a little stressed out right now. Dentist: Would you like me to prescribe some Valium?

Now it's:

Dentist: How are you doing today, Cindy?
Cindy: Oh hi Dr Dave, yeah I'm doing better. My fingernails are still digging into my palms but this time they're not bleeding. It's great. Thanks for the Valium. By the way, have I ever told you how cute you look with those two earrings in your left ear? Can I watch Chicken Run while you work?

One day soon I will have to pick up the phone and dial that number.
One day soon I will have to hold my head up high and walk through those doors again.
One day soon I will have to slide onto that chair without throwing up.

But not today, haha!

My opinion

I think a sense of humor should be a requirement for all bloggers.

So demanding

Ok, ok, I'll post the songs, sheesh, relax. Aw, I'm teasing you, Ken. I haven't exactly made the list yet, so I have nothing to post anyway. But the collection is GREAT so far, I'm very happy with all the songs. If anyone else wants to participate just email me your song (THE MP3, PEOPLE!) in the next day or so. I will post the final list in a couple days. Then if anyone is interested just let me know and I can burn you a copy. Gee, I hope the FBI doesn't show up at my house. DeeJay.

chamil10@aol.com

(yeah, I still use AOL, what of it?)

Hi Jamie. I guess you heard Nigella's out of the picture. Yeah, it looks like we'll be needing a replacement. How about you audition for me tonight? Okay, see you at nine.
By the way, I love the way you hold that pestle.

10 for 10

tblue posted diez cosas [rapidamente]
Here are his 10 things with my responses below them.


1. i lost my license to drive for ten years due to my inability to stop street racing. [they mean it!!]
1. I have received two speeding tickets and one illegal left turn ticket. All before the age of 22. I've been following the law ever since. Or maybe I just haven't been caught.

2. i rode with the haro boys while still a teen. [and continually got smoked going full/out up a hill while my dudes sat on their handle/bars and lazily pedaled backwards.]
2. I don't know who the haro boys are, but I once flipped over the handlebars of my bike and landed in the juniper bushes.

3. i tried out for the mtn. bike shit at the x-games and ended/up having six broken teeth removed by an oral surgeon after some tricky foreigner grabbed my brake as i passed him.
3. I have never even watched the X-Games and I had all four wisdom teeth removed by an oral surgeon when I was 17.

4. i sat behind maurice clarrett in math. [yes, i'm stupid!]
4. In 1st grade I sat next to a kid named Mark, and people would make a Mork and Mindy reference when they said our names together, Mark and Cindy.

5. i had someone try to rob stuff out of my backpack in port authority in manhattan while i was sitting on it.
5. I don't use public transportation. I'm a snob that way.

6. i talked to biz markee for half an hour in the kfc under times square.
6. I was in an elevator with Simon LeBon and held his cake.

7. i thought my name was bmx faggot [other variations include: skr8 faggot, punk faggot and raver faggot] for several years after i quit playing the sports you're supposed to.
7. I thought I was half Mexican and half wolf when I was 5.

8. i stayed awake for six days once.
8. I can't stay awake for more than one day, but then again, I've never done crank.

9. i got married to my wife while she was preggers. [shhh.]
9. I hate the word preggers.

10. i tested into the top percentile for the verbal on my gre and got the lowest possible score on the math. [never believe that bullshit about guessing c when you don't know. it's a lie to keep you from columbining the test moderators b4 you leave the lecture hall!]
10. I got an A in my Speech class at Sacramento City College because the teacher threw a fit and quit a month before the end of school. Everyone got A's.

Gossamer dreams

I have to congratulate Terra on guessing the answer to my dream question. Given the choice between the $10 or two shots of Patron, well you know which she chose. Karaoke and tequila, is there anything better to do on a Friday night? Throw a little sex into the mix and I'd say you have yourself a pretty good party.

On with the dream.......

There was more to this at the beginning, but it has little to do with the rest of the dream. It also makes no sense, of course, being a dream. I mean, I hate sports. So why would I be going to a major league basball game? Without YB, I mean? Anyway, after the game I was supposed to meet two friends at Banana Republic. Why Banana Republic? I'm sure I have no idea. It didn't really look like a Banana Republic, either. It was very big and smelled like musty books. There was a fuschia hue throughout the whole place, like a small dance club. It actually looked like that thrift store on San Carlos called Moon Zoom. So I was there with my friend Kim, waiting for these other two friends and I wanted to look at shoes. Naturally. There were tons of shoes for little girls but only four or five kinds for women, so I asked a saleswoman where all the shoes were. She kind of smiled and said she could show me her "hidden stash" and lead us to a small closet. She opened opened it and pulled up a trap door in the floor then left us alone. There weren't very many shoes in there but there were a bunch of old pictures and tapes and CDs. We found a cassette tape with a picture Joel on the front. He was sitting on a couch with a guitar in his lap and the picture was blurred a little, colors smeared to the side.

It sort of looked like this picture of John Mayer. Only in color and he was looking to the left.

I said to Kim that he had told me about that tape, he and Dane and Jermey had put it together some songs and sent it to some producers. They had only made like four copies though, and he didn't have one anymore. I was looking at the back, it was made in 1994. Apparently Joel had not hit it big with the tape, but I wanted it. So Kim and I went over to ask the saleswoman if I could buy it. The last part is very long and not very exciting so to sum it up: No, I couldn't buy it so Kim stole it for me.

There you have it. A dream about a blogger. Terra gets tequila with training wheels. Ha!

I LUV BLOGGER (2)

The comments thing is pissing me off, so I'm going to do what Grace did and post all my comments here.

Ken: Giving new meaning to the phrase "charmed the pants off her"

J: Awesome post, my vote goes to Tracy. More believable.

YankeeBob: 85% isn't bad, I still respect you. and you have to go with the PJ bottoms. T-shirt optional.

Ian: Since nobody else knows Japanese either just pretend. That's probably what that teacher was doing anyway.

Joe: Is there really such a thing as too many lightsaber as penis references?

Autumn: My stripper name is Scandal and my porn star name is Candy Cox. Also: sleep with a guy on the first date. Who cares.

Steve: Love the new template. Love the phrase: now that I rely upon it for masochism and a sense of accomplishment. I want a moon that looks like that shark.

Lightning Bug: I'm adventurous and spunky. I hope you're generous and free spirited. Also love the profile pic.

Blog Ho: Excellent handling of the anonymous commenter, I award you with the golf clap. *clap clap clap* (not the clap, as in the STD, I try to avoid STD's as a rule) Enjoy your vacation!

Cat: It's strep throat. Go to the doctor!

That's it for now. If you're not here that means either I have nothing worthwhile to say or you have haloscan. If you don't have haloscan....get haloscan!

I'm going to drink tonight.

Point of view

I work on the second floor of my building and we have big windows all along the side of the room. I was just walking back to get my Capri Sun and looked down at a car parked at the curb. You could see right down this woman's tank top so of course I pointed it out to my co-workers.
For some reason I felt this was blog-worthy. I'm starting to re-think that idea.

I have to say (yet again) Roy Hobbs rocks. Not only does that guy get me safely home when I'm a drunk fool, but he can convert iTunes to mp3's for me. w00t!

I luv Blogger

Dear Friends,

Do you feel like checking out Haloscan for your comments? I keep getting a "Blog not found" response and I'm quite happy with my Haloscan.
Just thought I'd throw it out there!

Love, Cindy

P.S. Keep sending me songs, this is turning out great.

P.P.S. I'm not neglecting anyone, I promise.

Just remember:

No matter how much you hate your job, at least you're not standing on the corner in a giant Quizno's cup right now.

A call to arms

I have a request for all my blogger friends. I'd like you all to email me a song. I need some new music and I thought it would be cool to see if I can get together a blogger CD. If it turns out to be any good I will make you all copies. I'm cool like that.
chamil10@aol.com
Just don't send me any viruses!

**In case you didn't see it
Email me the song.
**The actual song, an mp3. Not just the title. If you have the song in your arsenal attach it to the email. Okay?

Thanks.
Cindy

Ponder

I wonder why Terra has a missing post?

Kids these days

I bought one of those Bratz babies for my niece today. Not the regular Bratz doll but the baby Bratz doll. I would never choose that as a gift but she specifically requested one, and who am I to refuse a kid? I don't get these things. I don't think I'd like my kid to have anything to do with these dolls. I mean, they're great for blog posts on Peevishness and Botheration, but that's about it. Who really wants a doll dressed like a slut?

pictures

I started a side blog for my pictures. Now don't get all excited, there will be no pictures of me, just pictures I take. You read my words here, occasionally hear me speak, now you can see what I see here. I've added a link on my sidebar as well. I'm too lazy to add them all tonight, so I'll be updating soon.

What's $10 Canadian?

I'll never tell......

(said in skanky Brittany Murphy voice from Don't Say a Word)




P.S.
I think I will post random questions and never answer them all the time. This was fun.

I could never live in Seattle

Much better mood today, the sun is out and it's 67 degrees. At least, AOL tells me it's 67 degrees, all I know is it's gorgeous outside and it felt great to sit in the sun for a while. Even driving is a better experience when the sun is out. Some retard was blocking the lane when the light turned green so nobody could go until his light turned, and I wasn't even mad at him. Sure, I called him a dick but my heart wasn't in it.
I went out with Terra T again last night, man that girl is a good time. The band that played at the Brit was good, but of course I can't remember their name. The played good dancing music though, that's important. I had no choice but to get down, down, down, down....
I figured something out on my way home yesterday, too. It's impossible to be in a bad mood when you listen to Jamiroquai.

Uh oh, I almost forgot to wish Roy Hobbs a happy birthday!

game on

I had a dream about a blogger last night.
$10 if you can guess who it was.

Thursday, March 3rd (I'm going to be doing this all day)

6:00 am: Caden crawls into bed with me, tells me we're best friends.
6:20 am: Get tired of the wiggling and give up on more sleep.
6:30 am: Start The Emperor's New Groove and a pot of coffee.
8:00 am: Roll Hot Wheels across the kitchen floor.
8:30 am: Annoy Caden by singing the "Welcome Christmas" song from the Grinch movie.
8:45 am: Coffee has kicked in.
9:00 am: Put in the Offspring CD and dance with Caden to "Pretty Fly for a White Guy".
9:20 am: Switch to Will Smith and dance to "Gettin' Jiggy With It" and "Miami".
9:40 am: Decide to blog about my day thus far.

10:00 am: Back to the Hot Wheels, third cup of coffee, Paul Simon "Me and Julio" playing.
10:20 am: Talked to mother-in-law, set dates for visit. Yay.
10:22 am: Caden peed on the floor in the bathroom. "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes" is on.
10:30 am: Decide to finally get dressed, my jeans seem tighter than usual. Hm.

11:15 am: Put gas in my car, remember the days you could fill your tank with $10.
11:30 am: Grocery shopping with Caden. Received OK to buy carrots. Was asked to explain tampons. Answer: Something mommies need.
12:15 pm: Opened trunk to put groceries in, remembered trunk is full of luau decorations.
12:18 pm: Heard "Love me" by the Cardigans on the radio, was informed by Caden that he doesn't like girl songs he only likes songs where boys sing.

1:00 pm: As promised, Caden takes one bite of a carrot. He then sits with it in his mouth crying for five minutes until he makes himself gag and throws up on his plate.
1:30 pm: He's down for a nap and I think I will join him.

2:00 pm: Took a nap.
2:40 pm: Phone rang and woke me up.
3:00 pm: Watched Las Vegas from a week ago, man I love that show.
3:52 pm: Need to start thinking about dinner. Something without carrots.

4:20 pm: Got high. Just kidding, complained about my husband to my sister.
4:45 pm: Start dinner. Chicken, broccoli, baked potatoes.
5:00 pm: Warn the neighbor kid that the cat may bite while secretly hoping she bites him so he'll go home.

5:20 pm: Burned my hand on a cookie sheet. Just a little.
6:30 pm: Wonder where everyone is, blogs are slow today.
7:40 pm: Get irritated because I can't post a comment on Nina's blog.

9:00 pm: Put Caden in his "cooooozy jammies". His favorite green ones with the dinosaurs.
9:30 pm: Someone's bedtime.....
9:38 pm: Finally unpack my carry-on from the trip to Florida. Yes, I know.

10:00 pm: Get coffeepot ready for tomorrow, get clothes ready for tomorrow. I'm secure in my OCD, absolutely. My shoes are even out with my socks tucked into them.
10:35 pm: End IM conversation with Michelle, take out contacts, brush teeth, and GO TO BED. Caden got me up too early and I stayed up too late last night.

The End.

Tivo. My friend. My enemy.

I'm feeling pressured by my Tivo lately. I have all these CSI's on there, waiting for me. I have so many episodes of Carnivale that the season will end before I even catch up. I have two movies, Monster and Along Came Polly. I'm half way though the Oscars or Academy Awards or whatever you call that awards show that was on the other night. Now Tivo is telling me it doesn't have room to save something as long as I want it to. How dare it defy me? I'm the one in charge, I make the rules. I programmed you Tivo, and I can easily unplug you. OR....
Maybe Tivo knows that I can't actually unplug it. Tivo has the drop on me, boy. It knows I wouldn't give up my shows that easily. Who's in charge now?

anything but the knees

I'm reading a book right now called Dark Horse. One of those someone gets murdered someone gets kidnapped let's figure out who dunnit kind of books. Some Russians just beat the crap out of a guy, well deserved but still brutal. The thing that gets to me is the description of someone getting their kneecaps broken. It just makes me cringe to read about someone taking a sledgehammer to someone's knees. Maybe it's because I have knee issues myself, but I can't imagine how horrifying it would be. I can handle reading about all the other stuff, getting kicked in the face, smashed with a baseball bat, but there's something about the knees that just kills me. I read a book once where the bad guys drove stakes through a woman's knees into the floor. That was the worst. Fuck! Can you even imagine? It turns my stomach. Even reading about Joel curbing Dane wasn't as bad as the knee thing. Sure, it was sad, but what kind of low-life steals a Shrek Pez dispenser?

Hey Cat, here's a picture of the puppy I sent you.